8 people are locked in the blur chat house....each week one member will be chucked out of the house.....

By BIG BRETT on Tuesday, October 3, 2000 - 11:06 pm:

I AM ONE OF THEM! WHO ARE THE OTHERS?

By The Public Vote on Tuesday, October 3, 2000 - 11:06 pm:

Andy, would you please leave the house.

By Andy on Tuesday, October 3, 2000 - 11:10 pm:

4 male and 4 female contestants will occupy the blurchat house......the question is.....who will win?
interesting craig buttertwirlinova
big bret tich
andy happy kaelee
rsp stereopop
CONTINUE.... this as u please......

By Andy on Tuesday, October 3, 2000 - 11:55 pm:

I May as well start the ball rolling....
Day 1
The 8 contestants say goodbye to there family and friends for the last time,that is apart from craig(who has no friends) and bret who ate his parents the moment he was off the breast and onto solids.
They walk up to the famous door,andy offers to be a gentlemen to the three ladies tich,butter and stereopop and opens the door.He leaves kaelee there ,as she has about as much chance as being classified a lady as tich has of being single for the rest of her life.Bret rips the door off the hinges and `rolls` in.Chris and I notice interesting craig starts to cry as the realisation that he is a sad loser with no friends begins to set in his thick scull.For the first few hours everyone basically keeps them selves to themselves,especially craig who stayed in he toilet.The girls go to bed early,as vicki would say `they need there beauty sleep` the girls do not need there beuty sleep apart from, kaellee who us lads recommend sleep for the entire duration of the blur chat stay.By the end of the day andy chris and bret are playing cards,chris cheats and wins,but as a rewArd for his win he gets more food than everyone else.bret doesnt like this and so eats every bit of furniture in the house.

By Andy on Wednesday, October 4, 2000 - 12:03 am:

Like? Continue ....as long as i win and there are some saucy scenes and the stay is made as interesting as possible to the blurchat crew,i dont care.....go on luke and chris add some of ur magic to this.......

By Butter~Twirré on Wednesday, October 4, 2000 - 01:19 am:

Erm, can I loiter in the background, and stay out of the firing line by preparing some hot, fresh soup for the card playing lads? Oh, and the girls too of course. After all, we're exhausted from fending off Kaelee's lesbian advances and need our energy. What did she do with her three kids while all this is transpiring?

By Andy on Wednesday, October 4, 2000 - 01:28 am:

Day 2 morning
All the blur chat residents except big bret whos legs have collapsed under his weight wake up for breakfast.Over breakfast there is a very interesting discussion about happy kaelee which takes place.It starts when the lads complaining kaelee has been trying to take advantage of them whilst they are sleeping.Rsp then asks how old kaelee is ,and she says she is 18 and that she is a model with firm tits a sturdy ass and a banana going in and out of her pussy as she thinks about fucking a guy like you.................

By Andy on Wednesday, October 4, 2000 - 10:41 am:

Day 2 afternoon and night
It finally dawns on the blur chat crew that they will have to put up with a lot of unpleasant things during their stay.Big brets eating habbits for instance,also happy kaelees ever increasing sexual advances towards both the male and female inhabitants.She likes a good flirt does kaelee .Dinner is served tich butter and stereopop cook dinner for everyone,butter is a dab hand in the kitchen and knocks up a superb meal.Craig is still in the toilet cryng,chris andy and bret are discussing why kaelee is constantly fingering herself under the kitchen table,they also wonder where the banana has gone.....to stereopops disgust she sees it hanging out of kaellees pussy.Absolutely horrified the gang confront kaellee as to why she is doing this,she just lets out a high pitched scream and takes all of her clothes off.The fact that the ladys of the house had just spent the best part of an hour cooking dinner makes no difference to kaellee.All the gang look at kaellees grotesque fungus filled body and throw up into there dinner,this leaves the girls very un happy and they go off to the bedroom and sulk.Mean while kaelee is calld to the diary room,and is asked why she did such a horrid thing,kaellee replies i have such a nice boddy i may get a moddeling contract when i leave the house...........

By R~S~P on Wednesday, October 4, 2000 - 12:55 pm:

Day three: Stereopop and R~S~P disappear from the house in Stereopop's van w/NBS. Keep the damn prize money, we're gone....

By Thomas Williams impostor TWI on Wednesday, October 4, 2000 - 03:51 pm:

Day four: everyone gets annoyed with the antics of TWI saying "yeah" and "no" repeatedly. He stands on the roof and proclaims to the world that he never learnt to speak, and only knew how to copy his elders (namely, TW)..."Awww" the audience at home cry, "he only knows what he has been taught! Leave him alone" they shout at their screen, "especially the one that always swears at him...he doesn't know what it means!" The votes are counted and the impostor stays, which means the original Thomas Williams has to go. How furious the housemates are...and in the heat of the moment craig bellows "what ya gonna do now your master has gone!!! i hate you like!"
So along goes wee TWI to his room and sobs. What WILL he do now his master has gone? We await the start of next week...

By Out Of Order on Wednesday, October 4, 2000 - 06:58 pm:

Please please will you stop the fucking Big Brother theme!It WAS funny but now its.....erm...

WANK!

By R~S~P on Wednesday, October 4, 2000 - 07:26 pm:

Don't look at me and Amanda, we've already gone....

By Thomas Williams impostor on Wednesday, October 4, 2000 - 07:45 pm:

Day 5: Out of Order gets annoyed..."oh no"...Hey...I KNOW! Why don't you just not come to this page ... yes! that's a brilliant idea, then it wouldn't be so annoying...ahh, but that would mean you couldn't release some of your "inner-wank" tension on others , and make people feel inferior because you have a BIG complex about your penis....ANYWAY, i am getting away from the point, why not just steer clear of topics that have a big brother theme...or is that too difficult....andR~S~P: Don't suck up....be wanky....be a true blur fan!!!!Hail all things naff!yeah!no!

By Andy on Wednesday, October 4, 2000 - 07:51 pm:

Cheers tomas williams,I (who orchestrated this page)think its a great idea to do a blur chat house theme...everyone can do what they like.and tis true if you dont like a page...then why bother coming onto it,weve had a lot of entries for some thing people are bored of....

By stereopop on Wednesday, October 4, 2000 - 08:37 pm:

Yeah ... me and Chris all night long ... in the Vw/NBS ... evile laughter. We gonna rock it til the wheels fall off ...

And just a question ... why was I put into this in the first place? ...

By BIG BRETT on Wednesday, October 4, 2000 - 10:47 pm:

DAY 6 (MORNING) BIG BRETT PROTESTS FOR THE 17TH TIME IN 6 DAYS FOR AN INCREASE IN THE FOOD BUDGET SO BIG BROTHER ALLOCATES A HUGE CHOCOLATE GATEAUX TO THE HOUSE AND TELLS BIG BRETT THAT IF HE ASKS FOR ANOTHER FUCKING RISE HE'LL BE EVICTED AND BIG BROTHER WILL KICK THE SHIT OUT OF HIM. THIS WOULD NORMALLY DRIVE BRETT INTO A RAGE BUT THE ONLY THING THAT IS ON HIS MIND IS THE BIG GATEAUX AND HOW HE IS GOING TO KEEP IT A SECRET FROM EVERYONE ELSE.
ALSO - KAELEE COMPLETELY STRESSES AT ANDY ABOUT STINKING THE BATHROOM OUT AGAIN EVEN THOUGH HE INSISTS IT ISNT HIM
- TICH RUNS AROUND THE HOUSE NUDE WHICH SENDS RATINGS THROUGH THE ROOF
- T.W.I. IS CONSIDERING LEAVING THE HOUSE AS HE IS PINING LIKE A DOG WHO MISSES ITS MASTER SINCE T.W. LEFT

By BIG BRETT on Wednesday, October 4, 2000 - 10:50 pm:

BTW - THE WAY I GOT THAT GATEAUX WAS COMPLAINING THAT I HAD "BOLEMIA" EXCEPT I DONT THROW UP WHICH IS TRUE!

By Butter~Twirré on Thursday, October 5, 2000 - 10:09 pm:

Big Brother hasn't worn thin for me yet, since it hasn't been on in Australia and I've therefore never seen it. Sorry about the food shortage. I shall hop on down to the supermarket now, like a busy rabbit on an important mission.

By Arresting Occifer on Friday, October 6, 2000 - 01:42 am:

Hasn't worn thin for me, either. Actually I didnt like the original threads much, but this one is very funny.

BYE from the Officer.

By Arresting Occifer on Friday, October 6, 2000 - 01:44 am:

And Butter, dont demean yourself with menial chores too much of the time. Make sure you have time to for other things besides cooking for the boys...

By Butter~Twirré on Friday, October 6, 2000 - 02:14 am:

Aww, but I like cooking for them, bless their hearts. Fills me with glee that they (or at least Andy) seem to like it. They haven't realized yet that I'm actually a terrible cook (well, maybe they have, but are too polite to say so). Or is that slightly sharp under~taste in the stew actually something sinister...arsenic mebee? Thallium? Now, THAT could be a dramatic new twist...I didn't put it there, though (but remember, would I admit it if I had?)... which all up rather begs the question...WHODUNNIT?
Oh, and Occiffer, I expressed my individuality at the supermarket by indulging in a little shoplifting.

By Kyle on Friday, October 6, 2000 - 08:40 pm:

shop lifting ? I tried that once when I was 13. Got caught. Darn

And can I just say that the Big Brother business just scares me cos it's a government conspiracy to keep real news out of the media.

Thank you

By Arresting Occifer on Sunday, October 8, 2000 - 02:04 am:

Good for you, Butter~person. I shouldn't complain or criticise - fiddling about, shooting and cleaning the long barrels of steely hard, smooth, 7 inch police pistols is one of my pet hobbies. Who am I to give advice? Humph.

Whatever makes you happy...
Whatever fills your soul...
Whatever makes you sit up with wide eyes...
Whatever makes you lie back with smooth thighs...

Oops, got a little over excited there and automatically lapsed into an unusual form of cheesey romantic poetry. Please excuse that momentary lack of self-control, it would be enough to get me sacked and lose my generous pension upon retirement, and I wouldn't want that. Then I could only afford to buy the very average supermarket doughnuts, not 'Big Joe's Special Super Deluxe Fattening Doughnuts With Added Flour On Top To Give You A Fantastic Doughnut Moustache' from the hip Bakery down the road.

"A police officer is NEVER off-duty" - Section 28, Line 3, Police Proceedure Handbook, pub.1901

By Anonymous on Sunday, October 8, 2000 - 06:04 am:

SHOPLIFTERS OF THE WORLD, UNITE AND TAKE OVER!!!!!!!!


Smiths, for the ones who don't know...

By Bea on Sunday, October 8, 2000 - 11:11 am:

I've just bought "Louder than bombs" for £2,99!

By porcelainblahblah on Sunday, October 8, 2000 - 02:48 pm:

My god anon, I was just going to say that!

By R~S~P on Monday, October 9, 2000 - 02:50 pm:

No you weren't Maddy, stop copying.

By Out Of Order on Tuesday, October 10, 2000 - 11:25 am:

Some people hey Chris!No original bon ein their entire body!They really do piss me off a treat!(That was for Tom)and not scary Tom!

By Bea on Wednesday, October 11, 2000 - 04:20 pm:

Well, this has sort of got to do with a "Blur Chat house", ehehe

I've been remodelling my site... comments and suggestions welcome (write on the guestbook...)

At least it keeps you entertained while BC is off...
http://i.am/happy-bea

By Andy on Sunday, October 29, 2000 - 08:48 pm:

Lets get this show back on the road,
Day?
morning
the house now only has kaelee anastasia bigbrett and andy left..Each contributes to the houses running,anastasia does the housework and cooking(great cook she is 2) andy does nothing apart from sleep and talk to ana,brett makes sure theres no food left in the cupboard,and kaellee prevents andy and bret getting randy and having to masturbate through sexual frustrasion,as she tosses them off while sleeping..the boys dont know this yet though,but when they see the video will be horrified.
Andy organises a rave in the house ana loves raves,so does andy bret and kaelee too.Andy djs and all goes well music pumped up,bit boring with 4 people but eh? thats life.During the rave kaelle gets hot,and goes to the toilet to take her underwear off and comes back in.
Andy wishes ana had done that instead (winks at ana)Bret gets hungry and eats andys decks,so that ends the rave..
afternoon?

By BB on Sunday, October 29, 2000 - 08:58 pm:

Lets rock with Big Bretts fucking boomers!

By Andy on Sunday, October 29, 2000 - 09:29 pm:

I know y u call urself big bret now bret....Id much much rather look at a chicks pic,than u....Say sexy anas maybe...

By Big Brett on Sunday, October 29, 2000 - 10:08 pm:

HAHABOOMBOOM!
I got a clearer picture up under personal/name your slut!
I dont need to look round for chicks when the chicks come to me

By Butter~Twirré on Monday, October 30, 2000 - 03:28 pm:

Erm...where were we? Oh yes. 'twas curious being at a rave with only four people present, one of whom keeps making unsubtle suggestions about banana's. Ah but yes, everything has it's use, and it's just as well Kaelee was handy (pardon the pun) when you needed her, Andy and Brett. (Actually, I feel a bit daft talking to Big Brett when I don't know him...hope it's OK that you're included in the scenario of having a very strange woman toss you off in your sleep every night.)
And Andy, of course I will end up "doing that instead" [see above], especially since HappyKaelee goes through a brief period of trying to be a born again Christian and goes off anything to do with sex. This affair of ours has become very public, (Andy's and mine, not mine and Kaelee's). Even makes "News of the World"...Kaelee begins a failed career as a model (as have I) before turning back into the same egotistical nymphomaniac... ("Egotistical Nymphomaniac" ~ there's a good name for a band.)...Brett and Andy become film directors. Meanwhile, I attempt to launch a career coming up with interesting scenario's for a "Big Brother" themed~cyber~soap, and discover I'm really bad at it.

By Andy on Monday, October 30, 2000 - 04:07 pm:

DAY 6
Everyones called to the diary room,Big brother tells them there will be no prize money for the winners,but instead A Romantic holiday for the two left...
I wonder whos going to win?.....ummmmm
Kaelee doesnt need the prize money anyhow,as she has many jobs....advertising bananas,a model(i mean a statue for the surreal and deformed museum)Also she has a contract as a prostitute,with 45 year old virgins....
Bret would luv the money but,i dont really care to be honest....Andy and ana are the only 2 contestants who dont mind the idea of a holiday...i really wonder whos gonna win(and im the only one who can decide so....)
Andy is very happy that butter has offered to take over as the handy person in the house...only can i be awake when it happens?
One week left.......ooh,then were having a new topic...(what happens on the romantic holiday)should be good...lol

By Andynomonous on Thursday, November 2, 2000 - 10:13 am:

BRETT!! I KNOW WHO U LOOK LIKE,HAVE U HEARD OF CHRISTOPHER PENN ?HES OFF RESERVOIR DOGS AND BEST OF THE BEST FILMS..???IM SURE ANYONE WOULD AGREE YOUR A DEAD RINGER....

By Big Brett on Tuesday, March 19, 2002 - 12:00 am:

Yeah!

By BIG BOBBY BOGNAR on Tuesday, March 19, 2002 - 12:01 am:

i think he looks more like me actually

CHECK MY WEBSITE OUT
www.piperdowns.com

By WEE BRETT on Tuesday, March 19, 2002 - 06:31 am:

HIYA SEXY LEGZ ;)
DONT EVER SHAVE YR BACK, I LIKE IT FOR GRIP.
SHAGGABOOMBOOM!

By Quintal on Tuesday, March 19, 2002 - 05:07 pm:

Yes, I have become one of those sad cunts who write repetitious one word replies in every topic.
Naw, it's just all I can muster right now. Yeah.

By indigo on Tuesday, March 19, 2002 - 06:49 pm:

oh Quintal, you should be ashamed. But I'm beginning to understand the need to reply to a topic, even if you don't actually have anything to say - just out of boredom with a lot of coping.