You know what? I hate everything. I've been deciding for the past three weeks whether or not I should get a friggin wah-wah pedal for my guitar, and when I thought yes, I'll get it, I can afford it, the goddamn things're friggin SOLD OUT. I detest those words. I loathe being disappointed like that. Wanna know why? Cos it happens all the time! Life isn't fair! Why not? I don't know why! Cos the twisted moron who invented it decided to be a prat and make it unfair that's why! And the real icing on the cake is that I get my maths test results tomorrow, which will probably kill me, and I have a french test first thing in the morning. And my French teacher is a complete psychopath who thinks she is God and wears earrings about the size of dustbin lids. Infact I think they are dustbin lids. They cover a lot of crap don't they. I think I'll stop now.

Oh look it's Coping's brand new sound off board. Ta rara raaaa ra raaaaa boom boom de da boom.

By Eddy on Monday, December 4, 2000 - 12:23 pm:

If the Wah Pedals were all sold out, why don't you just order one in??

By Lucky on Monday, December 4, 2000 - 12:32 pm:

I don't have enough dosh money loot currency stuff to buy stuff with. An' stuff.

By Eddy on Monday, December 4, 2000 - 12:37 pm:

But you just said above that you could afford a Wah pedal.

By Caz on Monday, December 4, 2000 - 09:14 pm:

Yeah? Does it cost more to order it?
I hope both your frencg test and your maths test went well btw.
Try this at school> Kill your teacher. It'll solve all your problems. And give you some new for a change.
All my love
Caz.

By indigo le demi-francais on Monday, December 4, 2000 - 09:34 pm:

What is it with French teachers and REALLY terrible clothes? This woman - errmm, Mme Briant I think, about 55 and with the worlds scariest eyes - complete nutter, was once sponsored to wear a pair of ripped white jeans, a red football shirt and a blue science overall (she was meant to be a French flag) AND NOBODY THOUGHT IT WAS ODD!

hahahahaha

Ma nouvelle prof de francais porte des vetements trop horrible qu'en parler en anglais. eurgh eurgh eurgh c'est tout que je peut dire!

(excusez-moi que tu sais le francais. Je ne suis pas tres forte en langues!)

By indigo on Monday, December 4, 2000 - 09:35 pm:

wow, impressed myself there with how crap my french has become. Mme Briant would be ashamed!

By Lucky on Tuesday, December 5, 2000 - 12:08 pm:

I can afford a wah pedal... it's the p&p I can't afford. Yet.
Thanks, Caz, the maths test went awful but French wasn't as lethal as I thought. I can't shoot my French teacher cos her earrings'll get in the way. I'd like to kill my maths teacher, but she's actually an andriod made out of some sorta student-proof substance. Believe me, I tried...
French teachers have baaaaaad dress sense man. And they're weird. You ask my French teacher to turn on the AC, and she'll scream "WELL I DON'T THINK IT'S HOT, HONEY BABEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!" at the top of her lungs.

By Eddy on Tuesday, December 5, 2000 - 12:18 pm:

I talked to my French teacher about porn once.

By Kyle on Tuesday, December 5, 2000 - 12:38 pm:

My French teacher was Scottish. Consequently I speak French in a Scottish accent. It goes down well at parties.

By indigo on Tuesday, December 5, 2000 - 08:10 pm:

hey, me too! only in welsh.

Very useful if you don't feel enough of an idiot acting out the fact you want to buy a single ticket to La Rochelle using a 10F note and a pencil. Oh the happy memories of trips to France....

By nit on Tuesday, December 5, 2000 - 08:37 pm:

ah, i'm gasping... might it be a laugh?

By Joe on Tuesday, December 5, 2000 - 08:50 pm:

Let's all speak french, I've got an aural in the morning:

Alors, un petit chien fait ses devoirs, mais il ne sait pas pourquoi. Il a bu trop de chocolat, et j'ai une interview a Cambridge heir et j'essaye a arreter mon inquietude et mes soins. C'est lamentable. Je sense que je vais plurir.

Sob.

By Lucky on Wednesday, December 6, 2000 - 09:43 am:

Bonjour, zut, merde, oui, non, au revoir.

By indigo on Friday, December 8, 2000 - 04:58 pm:

tres bien Lucky!

Et Joe - bonnes chances dans ton examens!

Ah you've already done it. Good luck anyway!

Thinking about it, why do English schools teach French as the first foreign language? It's fine for me, seeing as half my family are French and it might come in useful if I ever want to talk to them, but it's hardly an international language is it? Even French textbooks are hard pressed to come up with anywhere you might visit that speaks French - mine just keeps relying on Martinique and Senegal.

And another thing - why is the first word everyone learns in another language (after yes, no etc) "shit"?

By nathallie on Saturday, December 9, 2000 - 03:39 am:

argh, joe, comment etait l'intervu? aujourd'hui, dans notre classe de civilisations anciennes, nous avons eu un petit debat, l'Athenes contre la Sparte, et mon amie, qui etait de l'autre equipe, m'a dit apres que je l'ai intimidee beaucoup... et je m'excuse aussi car je ne sais pas comment ajouter les accents dans ce texte.... j'espere avec tout mon coeur que vous seriez accepte a l'universite de ton choix, et j'en suis sur, car vous etes tres charmant, alors ne vous inquietez pas!

By indigo on Saturday, December 9, 2000 - 10:43 am:

"

By Lucky on Saturday, December 9, 2000 - 11:47 am:

Shit? Dunno, but I got it from seeing the French subtitles at the cinema. It sort of got implanted in my brain during Titanic when one of them kept on going "Shit! Shit! Shit!" and the subtitles were "Merde! Merde! Merde!" Why did I watch that movie? Some things are better left unsaid...
By the way, "shit" in Arabic is "T'ba", and "piece of shit" is "T'bakoon". I love subtitles.

And what the heck is it with Senegal??? If I ever take over the world, my top priority would be to bomb the damn place. Argh, I've had it up to my neck with Senegal!

By Joe on Saturday, December 9, 2000 - 06:38 pm:

Ah, Senegal.

Are you french canadian then nat? It's very good french.

My interview went quite well...soon I could be joining Sarah in merry Cambridge. Or not...

By nathallie on Sunday, December 10, 2000 - 03:12 am:

no, i'm in ontario (polish mum, thai father, spanish step-mum), but i used to be in french immersion. though now i'm in extended, feels like i'm losing it... i don't think i want to go to oxford, but i'm planning on taking my OAC english at summer school there. so i'm excited (not this summer, but next). i split my thumbnail in the pink today at work. hope it doesn't get ugly and i can't play guitar.
have a great day to all!
love, nat.

By Mandy Foxxxe & Randy 2 on Sunday, December 10, 2000 - 01:26 pm:

ME and Randy are liveing in Digget, Texas. Randys MOMMA and POPS are in Houstan and my MOMMA is in Phenix. My POPPA unfortunately Died and went to hevan about 32 years a go after he went sleep walking with our neighbours wife and fell down a mine shaft together.

By Joe on Sunday, December 10, 2000 - 07:00 pm:

I actually fucked my thumb ON my guitar about three months ago, making it difficult to hold a plectrum for three hours after.

What's a pink?

By nat on Monday, December 11, 2000 - 01:24 am:

the pink part of your nail bed... sigh. i'm gonna have an ugly thumbnail, with a short little nail bed... right up there with a face boil and world poverty, wouldn't you say? and yet, it's what worries me most at the moment. lovely lovely joe and all, have a great day!

By kacy on Monday, December 11, 2000 - 02:22 pm:

I always scratch up my arms on my guitars, the ends of the strings wound around the tuning heads always get me. It always happens when I pick up my guitar, I should change the way I pick it up I suppose. Between guitar, cat and thorn scratches I'm starting to look like...I don't know what really. A really scratched-up person.

By Joe on Monday, December 11, 2000 - 07:24 pm:

Hellraiser?

By Lucky on Tuesday, December 12, 2000 - 12:24 pm:

My guitar's a good little git cos it's never scratched me. But I sort of make up for that cos I've got eczema, so my arms end up scratched anyway, heh heh.

By indigo on Tuesday, December 12, 2000 - 10:08 pm:

I just have a bastard cat that feels the need to lie on the stairs in the dark (the cat's black so ou can't see it) then go crazy if you walk past.

OH MY GOD!!!!!

ALEX JAMES (God of the floppy fringe, inspirer of all other indie bass players) HAS HAD A NUMBER 2 CUT!

too traumatised to write more....

By Lucky on Wednesday, December 13, 2000 - 10:45 am:

What exactly does a number 2 cut look like?

By Eddy on Wednesday, December 13, 2000 - 11:00 am:

A Number 2 cut looks like shit.

Think about it.

By nat on Wednesday, December 13, 2000 - 08:32 pm:

is that like a ... shoot. it starts with an "m". short on the head, longer near the bottom?

By Joe on Wednesday, December 13, 2000 - 09:39 pm:

It's like an all-over David Beckham job that make syou look like your head has a thin layer of mould on it.

By indigo on Wednesday, December 13, 2000 - 09:49 pm:

you mean a mullet nat - and at least that might look kind of cool?! in an odd bass player way - no.2 is 2mm off having your head completely shaved!

By nat on Thursday, December 14, 2000 - 12:28 am:

alright, thanks, and it is a mullet! (that i was getting at). but no? good. 'cos they're awful. oh well, his fringe is gone, so are damon's locks, what's next? graham getting contacts? (and throwing his glasses in the trash bin? I GET FIRST DIBS!)

By Arresting Occifer on Thursday, December 14, 2000 - 06:48 am:

I'm in agreeance with Eddy.

Hi Eddy.

I agree with you Eddy.

Bye Eddy.

A mullet, though? He hasnt got a mullet has he? Its just shaved really short, isnt it?

By Lucky on Thursday, December 14, 2000 - 07:44 am:

Yah, it's the mould thing. I got a shock there Nat. I thought he had a mullet! Mullets are EEEEEEVIL.

By The Officer on Thursday, December 14, 2000 - 08:46 am:

Extremely so.

By Eddy on Thursday, December 14, 2000 - 11:39 am:

Haha, I canny understand why you have so much ill feeling to me Occifer.

If you made the remark because I was stating an opinion about the haircut known as a Number 2, then you were mistaken. Read it again, it's a joke that I canny believe no one has picked up on.

A Number 2 looks like shit.

Think about it.

By tam on Thursday, December 14, 2000 - 05:52 pm:

forgive my low iq...but whats a mullet?

By Lucky on Friday, December 15, 2000 - 05:56 am:

It's short on top and long at the back, and generally looks... er... really bad.

By Arresting Occifer on Friday, December 15, 2000 - 11:11 am:

I love you Eddy!

By Eddy on Friday, December 15, 2000 - 11:13 am:

Oh hello.

By Arresting Occifer on Friday, December 15, 2000 - 11:14 am:

OK, OK, all you people out there, I'll explain Eddy's joke for you...

"I'm going to the toilet to do a Number 2..."

Oh hold on, maybe this is just an Australian/NZ thing, Eddy? Could be...

By Eddy on Friday, December 15, 2000 - 11:19 am:

No, it's a very British thing, Occifer.

By Arresting Occifer on Friday, December 15, 2000 - 11:21 am:

Ahh righty-oh then. I still love you but.

By Arresting Occifer on Friday, December 15, 2000 - 11:23 am:

No, really.

Hey Eddy, I'm about to hit the streets of Brisbane with a girl from Gisbon! Purely platonic of course, she's my flatmate. She's been living the last few years in Christchurch, High St, to be exact. With a trannie named Kieren/umm something or other... Know any of them?

By Eddy on Friday, December 15, 2000 - 11:30 am:

Haha, it's spelled Gisborne, I fink, haha. Is she a Maori?? Cos they all are up North there.

And no, I don't know them, but I know High St really well. Thats where I buy most of me music.

Although she probably lived down the other end of High St. The rather umm.. scummy end.

I hope that has helped. And not offended.

By nat on Friday, December 15, 2000 - 10:41 pm:

.... and i always thought toilet humour was a thing of the lowly americans....

By Eddy on Saturday, December 16, 2000 - 02:47 pm:

Toilet humour is fucking funny.

By The Officer on Saturday, December 16, 2000 - 05:08 pm:

Oh Gisbourne...aha. And she's not Maori. She's burns in the sun very easily.

She was paying $225 per week for her room in High St - living with me is a slight comedown, apparently. No, no, that's maybe taking things a bit far. Oh, I dont know. But guess what? I just got kicked out a an AUSSIE PUB for not wearing dressy enough shoes and not wearing a collar. God blimey. I was actually the best dressed guy there by miles, in my humble opinion... Guess I just didnt fit in. Serves me right for even venturing out into the suburbs...ewww.

By Butter~Twirrélinov on Saturday, December 16, 2000 - 08:06 pm:

Hey, Eddy, have you ever been to the Cashmere Hills, and seen where the Pauline Parker/Juliet Hulme murder happened? I just found a "contemporary news article" image about it.
"Heavenly Creatures" has got to be one of THE best movies to come out of New Zealand, though I predictably predict someone will beg to differ.

By Eddy on Sunday, December 17, 2000 - 10:31 am:

Yeah of course I've been to Cashmere. I've got a few mates that live up there. Out of memory though I aint been to the murder sight. I don't give a shit really, although crime interests me, this one doesn't.

And Occifer, I thought you were a lady, not a man.
And btw, places that demand a collar and good shoes are not worth going into. Full of rugby twats and fucking farmers. Go watch a band instead, even if they are crap, you will be in place that has soul.

By Butter~Twirrélinov on Sunday, December 17, 2000 - 03:01 pm:

Christ I hate it when guys describe girls and women as "ladies".

And you do give a shit about the Parker~Hulme case, Eddy. You're just in denial about it. The dear Occifer could probably intuit why, just as well as I can. IT'S PART OF YOUR NATIONAL HERITAGE. ADMIT IT, ADMIT IT!

By Arresting Occifer on Monday, December 18, 2000 - 07:03 am:

Just because I love you doesnt mean I am a 'lady', Eddy. There's nothing wrong with a bit of good old fashioned MAN to MAN loving, is there?

And yeah, dear Butter is right. ITS YOUR NATIONAL HERITAGE, FOR GOD'S SAKE. HOLD ONTO IT. CHERISH IT. Suck it dry for all its worth and never spit it out. NEVER.

OK, collars and good shoes, yeah, I agree with you, Eddy. I never normally go to places like that. But I also caNNot stand a crap band. Lately, as my mood has taken me, I have been frequenting the gay clubs - they dont mind if you dont have a collar, actually they prefer it if you dont bring a shirt at all. Lots of straight people like me go there too, of course, because the dancing is just so much better.

Completely devoid of soul, but there's good dancing.

By Eddy on Monday, December 18, 2000 - 11:08 am:

National Heritage my arse. Two wee girls bop a bitch over the head with a rock, hardly Burke and Hare or Garry Gilmore is it.

I had great fun in a gay club once. But that's another story. Will tell if I get requests.

By Eddy on Monday, December 18, 2000 - 11:13 am:

By the way Butter, I have no country.

By Butter~Twirrélinov on Monday, December 18, 2000 - 10:02 pm:

Well, it's all highly subjective, Eddy. Burke & Hare I know nothing of, but Gary Gilmore was just a run of the mill common crim who shot two people during the course of some robberies. Rivetting, eh? Parker & Hulme bashed their victim forty~five times over the head with a brick stuffed inside a stocking. So I think the latter at least demonstrated somewhat more imagination. And the fact that they were two wee girls made the crime a lot more unique and unusual, did it not? Perhaps none of them are up their with Charlie Manson and the Manson Family, but for pure gratuitous shock value, I'd put the New Zealand brick~bashers pretty high up on the scale.

More to the point, Eddy, why must you always be so utterly dismissive and scathing of other people's comments, as though by extension that person themself is a piece of shit? Your idea's have intrinsically no more probative value then anyone else's (though granted, you've got a good point where Miss Jen/Foxy Fooker is concerned).

Don't get me wrong; you seem like a very dear and intelligent boy. I just don't see why you have to qualify your answer to my question by adding that you don't give a shit and the crime wasn't interesting. It wounds my feelings.

By Arresting Occifer on Tuesday, December 19, 2000 - 10:19 am:

Oh dont be wounded, Butter... Come here, I'll make things more pleasant.

Why Eddy you countyless bastard... Why not be civil? I just dont think I can love you anymore. . . .

By Trumpeter on Sunday, August 19, 2001 - 07:43 am:

Good grief, was that really ME (Ana), describing Eddy Lewis as a 'very dear and intelligent boy' in December last year? The things we come across when boredly perusing these long dormant topics! You ought to try it some time, oh rocking fellow Copers. Let us cringe in sync!!1

By The Occifer on Sunday, August 19, 2001 - 08:13 am:

Good grief, I believe it was YOU (Ana) describing Eddy Lewis in that way. The things we come across indeed. Dont worry though, it was ME (Quintal) telling Eddy that I loved him! Oh, bring back the funsters to Coping!
I was down at the pub last night yeah, having a few pints yeah, when some fat, ugly bastard called me a tosser. Brought back memories, yeah.
I'm off to the pool.

By Nat on Sunday, February 17, 2002 - 07:02 pm:

Did you end up at Goldsmith's, Joe? And Ian? What do you need to apply/get into Cambridge? I'm so excited for summer, I'm going to England/Scotland/France, partly on my own. And Italy in a March. Any UKers/French/Italians got any comments, i.e. where would be a nice place to stop for a bit? (esp. Italy - some of the kids'll be clubbing it for a few nights, and I wanna know if there're any "alternatives".)